Is this deja vu?

Do you ever feel like you expect bad luck to come around eventually, especially if you've dealt with it in the past and have been riding a high for a while? It's like summiting a mountain. You climb, climb some more, get super stoked at the progress you've made. You make it to the summit, you take your dumb selfie, and then you look down, and it's a very long way down. That's about where we're at right now. The trump card is winning. That's a euchre term. I'm from Michigan, would you expect any other card game?

So what am I really talking about anyway? My knee. It's currently treating me like that friend you love who never shuts up but you keep shaking your head and laughing anyway. I was riding a high for so long. I did have some issues per some past entries but otherwise, I've felt great since my ultra. Some aches here and there but ice always solves that. I did an epic speed workout on Tuesday (1000m repeats) and for the rest of the day, it was as if someone stuck a rod down my leg. It was stiff. Not immobile but stiff. That was a new feeling. The aching followed. I also felt like I got hit with a freight train of tiredness later that day but that was all work-related. I passed out on the couch at 7:30pm, my husband waking me up about a half hour later telling me to go to bed. The next day, I slept in, told myself I'd bike in the afternoon. My knee felt like a bag of...bricks. I wasn't going to say bricks. I typically test my mobility by doing a few different exercises. I do a lunge matrix, a pistol squat, and a figure 4 stretch. Each of these moves diverts the knee in specific directions and helps me narrow down a specific area. Easier to communicate with my therapist and doctor. With my experience working in orthopedics and sports medicine, if you can be as precise as possible about your issue, it helps your team that much more instead of playing a game of go fish. Each of those moves made my knee talk some cuss words. I ended up taking a rest day anyway because I was exhausted. The next morning, I got up early, I did my pre-run warmup and opened the garage to set out. The first few steps out on my right leg were awful. Instead of being an idiot and running through the pain, which I see FAR TOO OFTEN, I turned around and sulked back up the driveway. I hopped on the bike. Thankfully, biking doesn't aggravate it whatsoever. I would continue to bike my workouts for the rest of the week. I've since had conversations with my care team and have been advised to not do any impact activity until I get my MRI results, which isn't until NEXT Tuesday. Oye. Patience, young padawan.

What's this have to do with bad luck? I'm suppose to race in about 4 weeks. Last year, I ended up having to defer my half marathon because of my knee with a little over a month out. I'm not calling it quits quite yet, however, my likeliness of competing is at a very low odd. I ended up biking 60 miles last week and probably will hit more than that this week. I've overcome some big hurdles in my running "career" or whatever you want to call it. I'm glad I'm not a runner who hates cycling. I actually love it just as much. Can't wait to spend an hour in the dial-up internet machine. That's about I call MRIs. If you've never had one, they basically sound like when you picked up your landline to make a phone call back when we had AOL and you were greeted with the most annoying sound. I find them relaxing, actually, though most find them terrifying. I can understand that.

I remain positive because I've learned getting angry doesn't solve anything except successfully raising your blood pressure. My anxiety still has been on the higher side, though. I've spent some well-needed extra time on Headspace this past week. I also started doing gratitude journaling with a specific template. One of my teammates shared the G.L.A.D. technique. You write something regarding gratitude (G), something you learned (L), an accomplishment (A), and a delight (D). I really took to this because instead of just writing a basic list of random stuff, it really gets your mind going and creates thoughtful entries. Yesterday, I wrote "I raise gratitude toward my husband for keeping a smile on my face as I determine my running fate. I learned more words in my Spanish practice including vaso (glass) and taza (cup). I accomplished my longest meditation practice thus far: 25 minutes! It's delightful watching momma dove build her nest, once again, in the pomegranate tree." It feels more like a little short story instead of a list. Give a try. You'd be surprised how much you notice more now than ever.

I'll keep cycling through the week, providing that doesn't start hurting me at all. We'll see what next week brings!